When I first began to work in circles with women, an image arose when I was deep in meditation. The image was of many circles across the country, each circle held in a feminine container that linked heaven and earth. I reflected on this for many years. What did it mean, to connect heaven and earth?
Then, one day, at the circle for the women in the shelter, I met Carmen. She is a veteran who was trying to heal from the scars of war and a loss of a marriage. One day, I handed out cards with photographs of flowers. Carmen chose the card of a morning glory. It was taken in the early morning, so the flower was surrounded by darkness. But in the center of the flower, deep inside its petals, radiates a golden light.
Carmen studied the photograph on her lap. And then she began to speak, softly, as if listening inside herself while she shared.
I talked to three military doctors this week. They sent me from one to another. Each time they ask me to talk about the trauma of what happened. Each intake is the same thing, what happened, here’s a pill for you. Or, here’s a different one to try. I decided that was it. I won’t go see them again.
In the field next to the shelter last week, I saw a flash of red and took a closer look. There were red roses in the weeds! Every time I see them I feel good….beauty in the weeds.
This morning when I see the flower, it’s so feminine. It looks like a woman with her arms up, bringing down heaven, calling to heaven. And in the flower I can see a container for the light. It’s like the womb. We carry life in the womb. Life comes through us.
The image that I had of the circles held in the feminine container, came before I consciously understood it. Before I could embody it. But this is our work – no matter what difficulties we face – to bring the sacred all the way down through our bodies, thereby nourishing the earth. An offering to life.
Is it not what we yearn for, to live this mystery of being a woman? I imagine that this embodiment takes place in a thousand different ways because our life circumstances are unique.
But I do know that our tears of longing at night, our seeing the sacred in everything that is given to us, is the uniting of heaven and earth.